Biden’s women

WASHINGTON, D.C.—If Joe Biden wins the Democratic nomination, his running mate will be a woman, he said Sunday. He then promised that whoever he appointed as his VP he would stand behind them at all times. This statement quickly placed a small collection of women leaders in a position of sudden discomfort.

Biden, throughout his presidential run, has mentioned a host of women as possible vice-presidential picks who he would love to stand directly behind at an uncomfortably close distance, including former primary rivals California Sen. Kamala Harris, Minnesota Sen. Amy Klobuchar, and Massachusetts Sen. Elizabeth Warren. Biden says each has an aroma about them that he likes. 

“You know I don’t see why we can’t elect multiple women to Vice President. That’s how progressive I am. I say elect me a whole harem of’em,” Biden added.

According to a Biden campaign official, Biden says he is prepared to run a “vigorous and extensive vetting process” to determine his new female vice president pick should he become the Democratic presidential nominee. Biden claims the process has already begun, as he sees every woman as a potential running mate he can get behind. 

At press time Joe Biden was sampling the bouquet of various women’s hair, openly considering women of all races and age-range.

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